For several years as a traveling evangelist, I believed that I was more special than my host congregation. I walked into services with the consciousness that I am their ‘deliverer’. I sat in front rows seats – the place of honor Jesus warned us of (Matthew 23:6-7). My conception story made me to feel more supernatural than the rest of the brethren. I believed that because I was born to a couple who were declared biologically unproductive meant God sent me directly from His throne as an angel, and not a human. (thank God for the light today).
I demanded extra honor – even from those older than me. I would share my parents’ testimony of how they couldn’t have a child for years until I was born and opened the way for 4 more sons. People liked to hear such stories – they listened in awe. Women cried. Friends, beware of stories that exalt a person’s personal experience above the finished work of Christ.
My parents made things worse by telling me how I died 7 days after my birth… They said I foamed and passed on… Then 7 prophets of the cherubim and seraphim church surrounded me for 24 hours and I woke up the next day… They concluded that story by telling me that the prophets prophesied that I was going to be a ‘special prophet’. Such stories made me to be religiously sober.
My entire ministry was built around my personal story and not the finished work of Christ. I believed that I had SPECIAL anointing to spiritually break barrenness in women. I believed that by sowing Money into my life as a point of contact, a person would break free from barrenness – either in their business or in their womb. RELIGIOUS Pride, PENTECOSTAL arrogance and other things stepped into my religiously deceived mind… The Bible became too big for me to carry.
I hired someone to help carry my Bible each time I get invited to stand on the pulpit…. I was enforcing the fact that I was special… I stopped fellowshiping with the brethren without PROPER invitation – I called myself a man of God and I called other believers ‘church members’. I didn’t know that we were ALL Men and women of God. I thought I was special.
It was during those days of massive errors that I realized how powerful religious leaders are – they have power to kill and walk free. Trust me. The greatest power you can command is religious power – not political power, because even politicians submit to a religion. As a man of God, I could tell a brother that a certain sister was not the right wife for him and he would leave the lady – abandoning every feelings and emotional attachment.
Yet, when I fall in love myself, I would enjoy the moment without seeking for anyone’s approval. That was hypocrisy. Today, I no longer control who people choose to love provided that they are loving for the right reasons.
A religious leader can ask a pregnant woman not to give birth through Caesarean section and often times, those pregnant women would take such illiterate advice and die…. Alas, the religious leaders send their own wives overseas when they fall pregnant. This is why I believe that there’s so much blood in the hands of most preachers because of the religious advice or false hopes they give to their followers.
Back to my story….
Because I thought I was special, I couldn’t bring myself down to the level of doing business or getting a job. Business involves SERVING your clients and I didn’t want to serve – I loved to be Served. That was how mammon entered. Listen, any pastor who neither works nor does business will have ceaseless sex with mammon. Trust me. I’ve been there…. You can be a revivalist and post long sermons on Facebook but if you don’t have a job, you will bow to Mammon in your inbox….
They might be preaching holiness but they will still use fear as a tool to manipulate money out of your pocket. They might even be preaching Grace, but somehow, they will cheat with mammon. This is because, the most sincere way to meet one’s need is to work hard and provide services. By the way, today I run an I.T and Energy company and I serve my clients with humility. I have found my Apostolic place in the marketplace and I have broken away from mammonic doctrines and indoctrination.
I have been compiling a book on my story as a Pentecostal religious leader and I am full of tears… Tears of joy and tears of regrets… I am happy that I have seen the truth and the light which is Jesus… But I shed tears for the days I wasted in believing that I was more special than fellow believers.
Today, I’m fully purged of religious self righteousness and the filthy holier than thou complex. I have accepted the equality of all believers. I don’t believe in special callings – we are all specially called. The difference between me and you is how I am pursuing my calling and how you are pursuing yours. Brothers Enenche, Oyakhilome, Adeboye, Hagin, Kenyon etc are not more special than you.
They only pursued their convictions with a little more boldness than you are willing to do. So tapping into their anointing by sowing prophetic seeds into their lives at every opportunity is ignorant idolatry. We need to differentiate between someone being more popular from someone being more special.
I have a lot to share about my journey from religion to Christ – but when I get to publish the book, the first chapter will be “I believed I was special”.
My name is Charles Awuzie. I’m a survivor of religion but now a firm believer in the finished work of Christ.
This was culled from the Facebook wall of Charles Awuzie
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